A tad bit of happy

Oh boy, I keep doing it. I keep letting my blog get too far behind and then I spent time catching ya’ll up on things. It’s amazing how life goes to quickly yet at the same time I feel like I am watching the minutes tick away.

I’ve been keeping buy during my two week wait. I have a craft show coming up this weekend so the last few weeks have been preparing for that. I’ll be glad when it’s over but I’m really hoping to sell some of my things. I have some things that are years old that I’d love to find a new home.

So let’s talk a minute about the retrieval and transfer. I still really love retrievals. I love being taken care of and being put in the deepest 15 minute sleep of all time. I just love it. So all that went well. In past retrievals they usually retrieve less eggs than what they have measured in the days leading up to retrieval. But this time, they were measuring 12 follicles pretty much the entire time of stimming. So when I wake up and the doctor comes in to tell me how many they retrieved, and she said 17, I yelled out, “no shit!”. I couldn’t believe it. I actually got more eggs than what they have been measuring. I was flying high!

My clinic decided to change their rules and make all transfer day 5’s (which to me is much better). So I waited five days, while receiving the daily status calls. Out of the 17, 14 were mature and 8 fertilized. Ok. Still better than any of the previous cycles. I’ll take it.

They transferred in the three BEST embryos. Two were blastocysts and one was an early blastocyst. Again, better than last time. Now the fun part begins. We wait.

My transfer was on 1/19 (Monday), and the following Saturday (1/24) I began home testing. The morning test was negative. I was bummed. I tested again before I went to bed and it was positive. ¬†Each day I tested the line got darker. I couldn’t believe it. By the time it was beta day, the positive line was darker than the control line. Not that means anything but that didn’t happen before.

My beta was on 2/2. I was a nervous wreck even though I had all those positives. Let me remind you though, the last cycle I had positive home tests, a positive beta, the beta increased properly, but the u/s showed an empty sac. Even the second u/s a week later showed that same empty sac. I cried right there on the table.

So this time, I won’t believe it until the u/s, which is 2/16. So far away!

  • Beta #1 (14dp5dt) – 653
  • Beta #2 (16dp5dt) – 1670

So now I wait…again.

Cycle Day 3 – Start Clomid

I made my appointment early in the morning so I wouldn’t miss work. 7:15 to be exact. My alarm went off, the puppy started crying and I knew I couldn’t hit snooze. Did my morning routine and then headed out. As I’m driving I’m realizing that I didn’t need to make it for another location but in my confusion I did. It took me about a half an hour to get to this other location and they saw me right away, despite me being about 20 minutes early.

They drew blood to do a mandatory check to make sure I’m not pregnant. Then I was off to the private room for the ultrasound. My right ovary was hiding so the doctor had to push it around for the ultrasound to show up.

He said all looks good so unofficially he thinks we’ll be able to move forward with this rest of this process. If there had been large cysts, they would have postponed it until the next cycle.

I went home at lunch to let my puppy out and as I was leaving a UPS truck pulled up. I just knew it was for my package. I took it inside, opened it up and put the item that needs to be kept cool in the fridge. I headed back to work.

I received a text from my pharmacy letting me know that the fertility pills (Clomid) are ready for pick-up. On my way home I picked it up and continued home.

Around 8pm I took my first two pills of Clomid so if there were any side effects that I would hopefully sleep through most of them.

This all is getting way to real. I’m anxious, excited, nervous, scared, and hopeful. I think most of my fear is finding out this doesn’t work either. Then what do I do? Go back to the adoption road? But now my savings is almost gone. It’s so hard to know the best path to take but I’m not giving up.